Honor Your Mother
By
"A Soul Brought to Heaven" by William Adolphe Bougereau, oil on canvas, 1878.
Umbilical Cords: Physical and Non-physical Connection
Crossing Over and Creative Catharsis
It was a powerful time when my mother crossed over. I became more intensely connected with the divine and it was a great time for growth and release of emotions. I intuitively wrote three poems about her transition as it became increasingly obvious that the time was drawing near.
Words for each of these poems spontaneously poured out with great emotion, without any thinking. It was wonderful to have the release of emotion through the poetry. For instance, one morning in January 2010, I woke up with the words coming into my head for the poem, “Freedom”. Before going to the bathroom or brushing my teeth, I sat down and started writing. It was 1 1/2 hours of continuous crying and writing.
1st poem: Highway to Heaven
An angel knocked at Mother’s door one day
Invited Mom to leave her earthly form.
It had served her well. It was time to let it go.
2nd poem: Path of Thorns, Smell of Roses
Mom, where did you ever go?
You play the game of hide and seek so well
with all of us, so that we may grow.
3rd poem: Freedom
If Mom could speak to me from beyond the grave, this is my interpretation of what she would say to me and maybe to you too:
If your parents are alive, express your gratitude and respect to them
For all that they have done for you.
If they are no longer in the physical, you can still think it in prayers.
It is never too late to seek forgiveness or share our respects.
Let them know what they meant to you in their lifetimes.
Say what should have been said, erase all sadness that you may have caused.
We are eternal beings and where ever your parents are, they will know how you feel.
When that day comes, may your parents’ transition toward the Light be serene and blissful.
May their crossing over bring them ultimate joyfulness in their passage.
Martha-Penny Ulrickson: Peacemaker Vs Troublemaker
Well, Mom, I like to talk about these things, research and write about them. But you did more than that Mom, you lived them. You see, Mom was a peacemaker. She played the role of a loving, compassionate woman to everyone she met. Beneath that desire for the next great muffin recipe was her desire to make others happy through her small and gentle ways. The muffin actually represented a gift she could give to others, a way of loving others.
Even in my mother’s final four years in the nursing home, she exuded a sweet smile and pleasant disposition. The nursing home staff often commented on her unique and special attitude. Of course, she was not where she wanted to be. Yet despite this she did not lose that beautiful smile and the love in her heart for everyone, even in these trying circumstances
My youngest brother and his family live a few miles away and gave her a lot of attention…visiting almost daily whenever possible and taking her out for rides, meals at their homes and to special events, etc. It was hard on my brother emotionally because Mother would often have her bags packed and wanted to leave whenever he came to visit. She would also sit at the front door in her wheelchair and tell visitors she was waiting for her son to take her home. Even ten days before she passed, she refused to get out of his car after they returned from a ride. She did not budge for fifteen minutes. She still hoped to leave the nursing home almost until the end.
For quite some time, Mother could not express her thoughts in coherent sentences, but she was aware of what was going on. For example, my brother went to Florida for a month in March/April 2010. She did not seem to remember this when I reminded her of his trip on our phone call. But when he came back, she told him, “I thought you had vanished.” Also she said, “If I could go home, I would make pasties” (Finnish pastry pies stuffed with ground beef, rutabagas, potatoes, carrots and onions).
These were amazingly coherent statements indicative of a clear mind. Yet she could not understand or would not accept that she could not lead a normal life and return to her home. Shortly after my brother’s return from Florida, she could not eat …even pureed food because she would choke on it. Often, as a person gets ready to leave, the stomach or throat shuts down. It is hard to go through, as a loved one, but it apparently is necessary for the body to prepare. So she did not eat or drink anything for about eight days until she passed.
Graceful Exit
Mom had a very peaceful transition from this world. There was no struggling or resistance. I feel so blessed that she did not take her last breath until I could travel from my home in Texas to be with her in Michigan for her last two days. I said many powerful affirmations and prayers as I sat on her bed holding her hand.
The end of life is such a tender time. Nothing was planned ahead of time, and words of comfort and inspiration just all flowed out from my heart to hers. I cried more at her bedside than I did at her funeral. Even though Mom did not even have the energy to open her eyes, I knew she was hearing me.
I told her what I could to uplift and support her in her transition out of the body, such as:
“I love you Mom, I am blessed to be your daughter.”
“Thank you for carrying me in your womb for nine months.”
“Thank you for birthing me with great pain.”
“Thank you for nourishing me and teaching me along the way.”
“You are doing great. You look very peaceful and serene.”
“Don’t worry about anything Mom, God is taking care of you.”
“You are moving from one room in God’s mansion to another one. You are moving upstairs.”
“Go to the light. Go to the Divine.”
“Let go, Mom. Everything will be okay with you.”
“Do not worry about us. We will be fine. And we will meet again in the Heavenly skies.”
” You will always be my most beautiful Mother.”
I read Mom some poems I had written over the years about her and Dad. I also recited many prayers in English and my favorite language, Sanskrit. The nursing home staff who checked on Mom regularly commented that they had never seen such a peaceful death. No struggling. No resistance.
At one point during Mom’s final hours, her appearance became transformed. At first, I thought, “Oh I am looking at her from a different angle than what I had been used to after the nurses changed her position. Or maybe more sunlight is coming in from the window right now.”
I told her, “Mom, you look beautiful. Your face looks younger. You look radiant and serene. You are a beautiful angel.” She was definitely embracing more and more of the heavenly state. One foot was still in the physical world. The other foot was already in Heaven.
The Farewell Song
In conclusion, I would like to share a poem written by Katarina Gardner, one of the mothers I interviewed for my book, Cosmic Cradle. You can read her conception experience entitled “Cosmic Conception in the South Pacific” and her experience of pregnancy “Journey from Despair to Bliss“.
Here is Katarina’s beautiful poem, “The Farewell Song”:
There was a time when we were one
Back when this life you gave to me had just begun.
I was a child in your arms, Mama
I was a child
And you were the Sun, the Moon, the Stars
Back when each step I took was a step too far.
I put my faith in you, Mama
I put my faith in you
I’m gonna miss you
But it is time for letting go
And time to say the word that shakes me to my soul, “Goodbye, Goodbye.”
But I will always remember
How hard you tried to do your best for me
“Goodbye, Goodbye”, but for this one last time, Mama.
I’ll be your child again.
Mama, I’ll be your child
And then, “Goodbye, Goodbye.”
May’s Monthly Muse article is written by Elizabeth Carman, Ph.D.: author, lecturer and researcher on consciousness for more than 30 years, including long-term inner development courses in North America, Europe, and Asia. Elizabeth has taught meditation and personal growth workshops to hundreds of people. Along with her husband, she coauthored Cosmic Cradle, Souls Waiting in the Wings for Birth. Cosmic Cradle explores the superphysical life of our soul prior to biological conception according to 165 cultures and religions as well as reports from contemporary gifted individuals.
© 2010 Elizabeth Carman
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